Living in Cabrera--for real.

6 days. 50 + mosquito bites. Many great friends.

So it has already been 6 days since I first arrived in the Dominican and it´s definitely been a mixture of good times and hot times. At first glance, the small town of Cabrera is what I imagined: chicken running around, random fields with donkeys and horses, stray dogs walking around and some broken down houses. But I have already come to love what is going to be my home for anot her 14 weeks. Sure, I miss the comforts of having the internet, air conditioning and constant run ning water and electricity but the culture and vibrant lifestyle of the locals here never cceases to amaze me.

Join me on one of my t ypical days:

I wake up at aro und 8:00 in the morning and head to breakfast that Yaniris has so generously prepared for myself and Dan. We talk for a bit while enjoying a high-carb breakfast of eggs, toast and whatever else. Come 8:40 or so, Dan and I head towards the school which is just a short 5 minutes away. Along the way, we say Hola to the locals who are either working away or just sitting along the side of the road. Yes, there is a LOT of sitting around. I arrive at school where I am greet ed by lovely smiles and enthusiastic kids wanting to learn. Throughout the morning, I take a few kids out to practice reading out loud a nd help them sound out words. A lot of the times, I have to remind them to think of the letter and the sound that the letter ma kes. A little while later, the kids are reading. Through that and helping out wherever I am needed, playing board games or helping the kids throuigh Math bingo, I find myself quickly at lunch time, 12:00, where I head home for lunch. Yaniris has prepared lunch for me again and this time it is probably rice, habeuchuellas, a salad, some type of meat and a nice cold glass of mango juice. Nice and refreshing. I return to school for 1:30 where the older kids have their session. Wednesday was Club day and the kids got to join whatever club they wanted, I helped out with board games and played monopoly with some kids. On a regular day, the kids are often given a pick-and-mix session where they can choose to work on an assignment, practice for the talent show, do some reading with us or sometimes even cook with one of the teachers! This goes to about 3:30, and at that time there is either a show-and-tell about asinger, a group, an actor or something of that nature by one of the kids. This week, we saw a great one about Angelina Jolie. Other times we would sing some songs. School ends at 4:00 pm and that is prettty much the school day.

I walk home with Carissa, Brittany and some of the ot her volunteers and are greeted by some of the students w ho are picking mangos off trees. The other day, some of the students offered us some and it melted my heart right away. The mangos are fresh, delicious and picked with love, haha.

At night, we do a variety of things. Sometimes we go out for drinks right after at the Manny ´s, a seaside bar type thin g. Ot her times we go play some pool and relax on a few Presidente beers. Orange juice , alittle bit of shopping and interacting with some locals fills most of the day. I´ve been a bit under the weather here so some days I just stay in. But most of the time, there is always something going on and Dan, my housemate, is kind enough to show me around to the tiny little beach, to the internet cafe and other little gems in town. Fiona and Anthony also have been working with us and trying to get us accustomed to the local lifestyle and invite us to do things with them whenever they get a chance. I am really grateful for their openness in receiving our company.

Dinner is served at around 7-8 and consists generally of a meat, more eggs and some typè of carb. We may or may not go out in the evening again and then I generally head to bed in and around 10 on a weekday. That´s life so far.

On Monday and Friday, I head to a pre-school instead of the school with the Esperanza Project. There, I work with another group of excited children just starting out to learn to read in English. I worked with some of them individually to pronounce letters and I even read the book The Three Billy-Goats Gruff to them. It is a change of pace working with younger ones but it is refreshing and it keeps me on my toes. I love it.

However, there have been a couple of highlights with my time here so far. Upon arrival, Fiona and Anthony took us out to the -Blue Roof aka Mira Mar- on Monday night just to talk a bit and get to meet the other volunteers over some drinks. We went to Manny´s and enjoyed some great company and nice views. There have a few good walks with Carissa to random places and to the centre square just to hang out a bit. On Friday on baseball day, all the kids went to the camp grounds and played baseball. We got to play and Carissa, Brittany and I happened to be on the same team and won our first Dominican Baseball game 17-16, a true nail-bitter. I also got to enjoy a nice German meal at d inner last night wihen we went out with a bunch of the other local gringos. Today, Car issa and I headed to the local waterfall which we learned was a saltedero and rode on Yaniris motorcycle thing. There, some locals were jumping off for us and helped us down to the bottom where we got to jump into the nice pool of fresh water as well . Later on, we enjoyed a nice afternoon on the beach, Playa Grande, where we relaxed, swam in the Atlantic ocean and played a bit of Bocce Ball --of which I have never played before and ended up winning the second game, yay!

But here I am. 6 days in and as I said over 50 mosquito bites. A little bit sick but I bought some local medication and I hope it will be fine. Life so far has been incredible to say the least. It is interesting to note the difference between the rich and the poor even within this town itself. There can be really nice houses with what seems to be two floors, nice furniture and cars all around and then right across the street there is a broken down structure where some people may live. A bottle of Dasani water of bottled juice is 20 pesos, a mere 50 cents. Internet? Last time, we used 3 computers at the internet cafe for 20 minutes each and paid only 45 pesos, just over a dollar. It is incredible to think of money in these terms but there is obviously a difference in the standard of living here with that of Canada. Like I said, there is a lot of sitting around, in the dark and whatnot. There is electricity 60% of the time and if you do not have a generator in your house, you simply do not get electricity. There is a slight drought here in Cabrera (maybe all of the DR, I´m not sure) and during parts of the day you don ´t get running water. Sometimes we have to save up water in a bucket so we have some for later. That is the reality that some people face not for 6 days, not for 15 weeks but for their lives. I can only be an advocate for what I live and I´m glad the locals have embraced me with open arms.

Life is not as I expected it though. I think I came super prepared thinking that all water must be purified and that there are a lot of don´ts that I should be worried about. Sure, we take care of ourselves and take precautio ns but for the most part we´ve been experiencing life as a local would. Although we would not drink out of the tap water, not even Dominicans do, there is a good system of clean bottled water that we use to refill our bottles with. Speaking of which, I lost my water bottle again (the same one I lost on Dan´s grandparents´farm... just not alucky bottle for me, heh). I will keep safe, especially when Im not in Cabrera bu t f or now, life is good.

I can´t wait to dive into the adventures that behold me in the next 14 weeks. Tomorrow, we are going to a bigger town for the day, we are headi ng to Caberete.

Scared?

I can't help but sit here and think tonight. I'm currently trying to fix my sleeping habits--it's been an ongoing battle of 5 am - 2 pm for the last little bit. I only have a week left to adjust and I think with going to Waterloo tomorrow that will be the start. I have to wake up early to catch a bus. But what keeps me awake right now is thinking. Thinking about the future and my time in the Dominican. I spent my day at Starbucks with my friend studying Spanish. Literally, I sat in Starbucks and for the most part studied over 100 pages of my Spanish 101/102 textbook. A lot of it was familiar and I think it's good to refresh my memory but I have a lot left to accomplish. I want to finish that textbook, read through my 201A/B textbook and glance through my Spanish phrasebook, haha. I hope I can do it! But I cannot help but check my Facebook and whatnot. Slowly but surely, I am faced with the reality that a lot of my friends are heading out:

Natalia posts that her ville actuelle is Mbuya, Mukono, Uganda.

Sebastien posts that his ville actuelle is Kariobangi South, Nairobi Area, Kenya.

At the same time, Nicole posts "So I just completed 1/3 plane rides before I arrive at my final destination and a little five year old boy has already made me cry from the statement: "Why are you going alone? Doesn't anyone love you?" - haha"

It's exciting and it's new. I have planned for over 8 months for this adventure; this adventure that I have been thinking about since starting university--I knew I wanted to do a Field Studies! But when I'm not busy shopping for last minute deodorant that will fit carry-on standards, I am hit with the reality that I will not have electricity 40% of the time in the DR, let alone internet. My network of support will disappear and although I will want to check my emails and see what is happening in the world, a part of me does not want to. I want to take in the experience as much as I can, learn Spanish, learn the culture and interact with locals and tourists alike--see what brings each person to Cabrera! All these things float through my mind and I begin to get nervous. I took my last dose of Dukoral tonight and it sucked. Tomorrow I will take my malaria pills again. My next week now seems so short--there isn't enough time.

I guess I don't really know what to expect in the last few days. I will enjoy each and every moment of it to the fullest and I guess when next week rolls around I will have to be ready. Next week at this exact time I will be sitting in the airport probably--my flight leaves in an hour and 55 minutes. I only hope my worries will have dissipated. But I guess that's also the fun of it--to be shocked and to be wowed.

To all my friends who are travelling this week, Buena Suerte and safe travels!

Living with Anticipation.

Applying to Beyond Borders last year meant that I was ready to go on an experiential learning adventure: to volunteer. Despite having mentally prepared myself for the trip, it was not until today that the reality kind of sank in. Today was the last day of classes. The everyday comfort of living in a routine has suddenly ended and I am faced with the eventuality of actually going to the Dominican. In fact, depending on when my flight is, I may leave in one month's time. I am beginning to live with anticipation.

With every adventure though, it is important to reflect on the journey that has brought us to where we are today. In harmony with Tim's video, I will explore the challenges, triumphs and teachings from the two terms that has brought me to where I am today. Here's to Beyond Borders!

On the first day to class, I was definitely apprehensive. What did Beyond Borders mean? Everyone accepted into the program is a leader in some way. Many have formal leadership roles and all have a reason as to why they were in the program. To be honest, I thought everyone was amazing and had a lot more experience than me--I was intimidated. Yet throughout the past two terms, I have grown to love my new found group of friends. The connections which started off as awkward hellos on the street soon became a linkage of meaningful texts, messages and group bonding sessions. Whether we were working on a fundraising idea, making cards or just hanging out, we were committed to making the experience a good one. Truly, I do believe that what you put in is what you get out of an experience and in this group, everyone put in 110%. I honestly feel that, although cliché, individuals in our Beyond Borders cohort will do anything in their power to ensure everyone is successful.

This group has truly taught me the power of selflessness, what it means to work in a group environment and has reminded me of the importance to relate to one another. I have always been a pretty independent worker. Although I did not mind working in groups, my preference was always to be in control and to do things myself. Working with my cohort, however, I have learned both to trust and to accept spontaneity: life doesn't always turn out the way we think it will, and that's okay.

Throughout the term, I have also learned a lot about development. As Brilé noted, the Beyond Borders program is counterintuitive. It truly challenges the traditional methods of pedagogy and the ways in which we view the world. What is the role of experiential learning? How is eco-tourism different from what we are trying to do? I definitely thought I had the answers to many of life's problems. Corruption is bad; we are going to help the poor. Yet the lessons and discussions amongst my peers and in class have showed me that corruption isn't always black and development work isn't always white.
Beyond Borders takes our knowledge of development a step further and asks whether or not organisations actually want the volunteer's help or do they just want the economic resources the volunteer brings. The program has challenged me immensely throughout the last two terms; I begin to look at the world, not necessarily cynically, but with an analytical frame of mind. I have come to understand the reasons behind the action.

Whether Rigoberta Menchu meant to paint a particular picture of her life in her testimony or not, her mission remained the same. There is much controversy behind the truthfulness of her work, I, Rigoberta Menchu, yet perhaps her living conditions are less important than the message she is trying to portray. The fact is, she was an advocate for the lives for all indigenous Guatemalans and she sought to expose the injustices inherent in the system. Beyond Borders taught me to look behind the apparent.

I hope that, as a result of my experiences, I will be able to understand the complexities of life within the Dominican Republic and its neighbour, Haiti. I have found a passion in understanding the implications of being stateless as a child of a migrant worker. I have begun to care so much more about the Dominican Republic than I had ever thought I would. The xenophobia and racism within the Dominican Republic stems from the colonial roots of the two nations. The deep-rooted conflict is not necessarily one that can be solved but will ultimately stay with the groups. The truth is, Beyond Borders has taught me to become passionately involved. Instead of "helping out," I have learned to work with others and understand what matters most to them. My classmates have shown me how to put 110% in everything I do.

So I currently live with anticipation. I am excited and nervous about the 3 months ahead of me. My comforts will be taken away and my classmates will not always be there to support me in my efforts. However, they have prepared me to trust in myself, trust in others and to live passionately. Our learning doesn't stop here, Sebastien did a good job and reminded us that the world is our classroom.

Living in the Dominican Republic

Up to this point, my blog has mostly been about my general thoughts: how I will fit in, norms by which I live my life and ways in which I envision myself to (re)act appropriately to new experiences. I have briefly touched on the culture of the Dominican Republic but have yet to talk about its geography, the climate and other physical conditions in which I will encounter during my 3-month stay. So, here's to the Dominican Republic:

When asked to think about The Dominican, most people think of a tropical climate and a vacation spot full of resorts. They travel to the country and although they have been there, they do not truly get to interact with its culture. This summer, I get the rare opportunity to live in a host family and understand life as a local, 130 km away from the capital Santa Domingo, in a town called Cabrera. Although the region is still undeniably beautiful, my trip there will not be a trip in the park.

The People
As mentioned in my previous blog post, the people of the Dominican Republic come from a varied background. 73% of its citizens are of mixed background while its next highest population being white, accounting for about 16% of the population. What unites the country most, however, is probably its shared religion: 95% of its people are of Roman Catholic descent. Interestingly enough, though, Cabrera does not share in this faith tradition—its 39, 000 population shares in a mainstream religion of the Christian Evangelic Church.

Economy
The Dominican has mostly been known as an exporter of coffee, sugar and tobacco. However, there has been a shift in recent years and now the service sector and tourism now account for 65% of its GDP. However, despite its attraction to tourists, the nation is not as glamorous as it looks. Over 40% of the population lives below the absolute poverty line and this makes for a huge gap between the rich and the poor. In fact, the top 10% of the population enjoys over 40% of the GDP, whereas the poorest half of the population share less 1/5 of the nation’s GDP.

Although Cabrera is located on the coast and is home to one of the most beautiful beaches in the world, La Playa Grande, it is not dependent on tourism as a main source of income. In fact, the economy in Cabrera is driven by cattle, its milk and meat, mixed with a bit of agriculture.

Climate
While thinking about the Dominican and when I am going to be there (May-August), I was afraid of its climate. Although I whine and complain about the cold weather now, I think it is harder for me to be active in the summer months. At least when I’m cold, I can wear more clothes and react accordingly. In the scorching hot heat, however, sometimes you are paralyzed and just cannot continue to work. It was to my delight, then, to find out that the Dominican’s temperature does not vary that much throughout the year! It’s temperature during the hottest season, May – October, ranges between 22-30 degrees Celsius. The main difference is that it is more humid during these months. Furthermore, the first month when I will be there, the Dominican sees the most rainfall. Fortunately, it is expected to be in short bursts followed by sunshine.

Despite the weather being ideal during the summer season, it is actually the low season for tourism. Most tourists often visit the Dominican to seek refuge from the cold North American winters.

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Now what am I doing in the Dominican? Throughout my blog, I have mentioned briefly the name of the project with which I will be work, The Esperanza Project. A literal translation of its name would mean The Project of Hope. The Esperanza Project is a non-profit organization, run and founded by a Canadian/British couple, that was “born out of a perceived need to provide a much needed supplementary education and extra-curricular program, giving individual students an opportunity to explore, create, and inspire, whilst empowering them to grow academically and socially, in a safe, supportive, hands-on learning environment” (Esperanza Project, n.d.).

I will be running an individual sports section at the camp with another student from the University of Victoria! I’m not 100% sure what we’ll be doing yet but we have the months ahead to plan and prepare a program that can be reused: obstacle courses, relays, team building exercises and the like. If you have any ideas, send me a message and I’ll be happy to bring a piece of you to the Dominican with me!

There is no doubt that the experience will be hard and challenging. Living in the Dominican Republic will not be a walk on the beach. I will live the life of a local, away from tourist infrastructure: very few comforts of my normal life will be present. The Spanish language, although I have studied it, will be a barrier to both my host family and myself. Yet despite all these challenges, I am hopeful. I am hopeful that I can learn and become an advocate for what happens in the Dominican. I am hopeful that I will become a trusted member of the local community and I am hopeful that my presence will be well received.

I invite you to take a look into the town I will be in—I hope this blog gives you an understanding of my excitement and an appreciation that I will not be going as a tourist! Here is a link to a video that some women took passing through Cabrera in 2010:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZzC_L2HBs8&feature=player_embedded#at=515

Works Used

https://www.cia.gov/library/publications/the-world-factbook/geos/dr.html

http://www.lonelyplanet.com/dominican-republic

http://www.esperanzaproject.ca/index.php/about/

Living.

On Friday, March 18th, I had the pleasure of hearing Lieutenant-General Roméo Dallaire deliver a keynote address for the Art's Student Union at the University of Waterloo. Dallaire, most known for his refusal to pull UN troops out of Rwanda during the genocide in 1994, talked mostly about the international community's responsibility to protect when a national government fails to provide security for its citizens. What struck me most, however, was his question "Are some humans more human than others?"

He understood conflict and a nation's willingness to intervene politically in terms of gain. When "personal" interests are not met, one's desire to intervene dramatically decreases. Such was the situation, as he explained, in the summer of 1994. The international community was hesitant to label the atrocities within Rwanda as genocide. Terms including "tribal civil war" and "acts of genocide" were used to describe the massacres, yet these terms did not necessitate an immediate reaction from the UN to intervene. In fact, when several Belgium UN Peacekeepers were killed, the UN urged Dallaire to pull his troops out because their lives were at risk. Yet despite this sense of urgency for peacekeepers, there was no similar response in fear for the lives of Rwandans. Why is this so? Can it be, then, that some humans are more “human” than others and deserve better treatment? Fortunately, the UN General Assembly has, since 2005, adopted the Responsibility to Protect, calling on the international community to intervene “where the state is unable or unwilling to meet its own responsibility” (Evans, 2008). As a result, there is now a mechanism of response that puts an emphasis on all human life, and not only those “worth saving.”

Despite the progress towards the equality of human life, however, there are still regions of the world where someone’s life is worth less than that of their peers. Such discrimination effectively denies thousands of individuals the “right to a range of economic, civil and political rights, including their right to acquire a nationality, to education, to security of the person and to freedom from discrimination (Amnesty International, 2007). Yet as a Canadian citizen, this reality of life is foreign and is at times disheartening.

Although such discrimination is not apparent in my daily life, it may very well be this summer. The Dominican Republic has had problems with illegal migrant workers coming from their neighbouring country, Haiti. In fact, estimates say there are approximately 800, 000 – 1, 000, 000 Haitians working in the Dominican Republic, accounting for approximately 10% of its population (Dominican Today, 2010). As a result, government officials have been increasing checkpoints for identification and deporting Haitians, who may have spent the last 10 or more years in the Dominican when the cane sugar industry needed help. The result? Many children born in the Dominican Republic with Haitian parents are denied their right to a nationality, and are considered stateless (Amnesty International, 2007). The lack of proper documentation and witnesses at the time of their birth make it hard for these children to gain Haitian citizenship as well. The children are, then, destined to a life of poverty: they cannot receive education and are denied many basic services.

This is what we should have to worry about: living. It is the reality of many people in the world that they stress about their next meal and where they will find work. On the other hand, last week’s newest Youtube sensation Rebecca Black reminds us that our biggest concern is sometimes determining which seat we can take in our friend’s convertible. So perhaps it is time to pick up a book, learn about an issue and fight for something that matters. We need to start looking beyond ourselves and start seeing the human in others.

Tim notes in his blog that Canada’s 18-30 year old population represents 35% of its demographic. This is enough to make a significant change in the politics of Canada, if we take a stand and vote for the issues that matter to us. In fact, Roméo Dallaire, as a current Canadian senator, noted that our generation has the ability to form a new political party if we truly wanted to and theoretically “take over parliament”. Yet the apathy and complacency in our lives focus our attention on the immediate and what is close to home.

In a way, it is ironic that my Beyond Borders placement is in the Dominican Republic, a country where the rigidity of its borders is constantly being fortified.
I do not know how this will affect my experiences in Cabrera. Fortunately Roméo Dallaire reminds us that life is valuable and, as such, I will try my best to value life in each person I meet.

Work Cited


Amnesty International. (2007). Dominican Republic, Haiti, and the United States: protect rights, reduce statelessness. Retrieved from http://web.archive.org/web/20070422232810/http://web.amnesty.org/library/Index/ENGAMR270012007

Dominican Today. (2010, June 29). Dominican immigration: number of illegal Haitians jumps 15% to 1.0M after quake. Retrieved from http://www.dominicantoday.com/dr/poverty/2010/6/29/36162/Dominica n-Immigration-Number-of-illegal-Haitians-jumps-15-to-10M-after

Evans, Gareth. (2008). The Responsibility to Protect: ending mass atrocity crimes once and for all. Washington D.C.: Brookings Institution Press.

Living Truthfully

One of my favourite companies recently released their new company logo. For its 40th anniversary, Starbucks removed the "Starbucks Coffee" around their logo and made the Siren the focal point of their logo. The company's decision, aside from aesthetics, was due to the fact that they no longer wanted to be "limited to coffee" despite its success stemming from its coffee roots in Seattle. To be honest, I thought it was dumb and I did not like it. What I have learned to love is now different, although it's the same. Yet the more I think about this, I wonder how much this has to do with me: a fan of Starbucks--which I even refer to as "Starbs." In fact, the company's decision has nothing to do with me. Starbucks, as an entity, felt the need to express itself differently and I think that's the key point I was missing.

Much like Starbucks, this summer I have the opportunity to re-invent myself. In all honesty, I could be whoever I want and no one would know the difference, aside from Carissa and Brittany with whom I am travelling and are a part of the Beyond Borders crew. I have come to the realisation that Starbucks' new logo has less to do with pleasing others than to being true to itself, as a company. I am not saying I will try all the things I've been too scared to do and wreak havok in the Dominican Republic but there are aspects of my life which I would like to develop.

One such aspect of my life is sports. Personally, I don't think I am necessarily bad at sports but I'm also not going to say I'm very well coordinated and skilled. I think, in a way, sports have become a scary part of my life; it is an opportunity to be vulnerable and to not be good at something--to look stupid. If I'm being honest, I sense more pressure in performing well in front of male peers, with whom I would normally play, and perhaps I am "bad" at sports because I am too scared to even try to be good. Yet this summer, I have signed up to run the Individual Sports station with the Esperanza Project. I guess my hopes are to be comfortable with my skills, regardless of what the are, and to inspire the youth to be okay with trying hard even though the results aren't necessarily what we want. Most of all, I hope to be a positive role model who is okay with being who they are.

This week, I also had a marked change in attitude towards going to the Dominican Republic. Finally, it seemed real. In addition to getting my shots about a week and a half ago, we had to look at the concrete risks of the Dominican Republic and we also had a session about packing and what to bring!
I learned about the risks of worms and parasites, the likelihood of earthquakes, hurricanes and tsunamis and the dangers of taxis in the Dominican. Yet despite all these dangers, I think what changed me most was my conversation with Carissa and Brittany this past Saturday.

We decided to meet up at William's to discuss some of our fears, expectations and what we're like under stress. It made me think, again, at the person I want to be and who I will have to be when we're in the DR. Normally, I try to avoid conflict. It became evident, however, that frustrations will be a regular part of our life simply because of our situation. Although I have an intermediate level of Spanish, language will no doubt cause conflict: whether they arise from misunderstanding or total non-comprehension. Secondly, after thoroughly discussing our dislike of bugs, it seems like I may need to get over my squirmish self and take one for the team! Although something like dealing with bugs might seem small, it still puts me outside of my "normal." I will be challenged to live out my fears, to live in response to others and to test my limits. Yet my desire to avoid conflict and please others puts me at risk. Living truthfully will be a challenge--I hope I will live true to my limits and only be "the man" that tries to "help" the girls.

I hope to re-invent myself yet I hope to acknowledge my limits. From volunteering, I think I've had this sort of expectation for myself. WASL is a great place to connect with others, "do some good" and try new things. My first two times there, I was definitely "trying to fit in." However, I am much more comfortable there and am not afraid to be myself. I honestly hope I remember how that feels so I can connect with others and not be afraid to show who I am.

Living truthfully is liberating. I invite you to show your true self too.

Living Outside the Circle

Reading this post, you may have noticed its title: Living Outside the Circle. It's funny because, in a way, it's a joke that a friend and I have in reference to 'Thinking Outside the Box'. However, for us to truly think outside the box, we feel it is necessary to not even think in terms of boxes and hence 'Outside the Circle'. In order to make any radical change in the world we live in, we have to think critically from a mindset different from that which created the initial problem. I am going to talk about the problems we face as a result of the language we use.

The power of language is truly remarkable. The tone in which we speak and the words we choose to use can change a situation drastically: we can make an inclusive environment or we can threaten the safe space that exists. Tim pointed out in his blog "I'll Make a Man Out of You" that we live in a world defined by gender stereotypes and are defined by specific words. Heaven forbid someone says that you "throw like a girl" because girls... are inherently unable to throw? Why is "you act like a sissy" an insult? The words we consciously, or sometimes unknowingly, use have an impact on the lives of those around us. Similarly, guys often feel the need to "act tough" or perhaps withhold their tears. Why is this so? Tim pointed out very well in his blog that these because we associate certain words and actions with being masculine or feminine, and we do not want to act any differently, it would make us weird. "Men" actively make fun of chick flicks because... I don't even know why. Does it threaten their masculinity? How do such remarks affect those around you, who may enjoy chick flicks? It is time to pay attention to what we say and the impact words have.

The image above was found throughout the University of Waterloo campus not long ago, near the end of the Federation of Students (FEDS) elections. Posters were set up on campus over the face of a female FEDS Vice-President candidate. Although no physical harm was done, its effects resonated throughout campus and threatened the security of several university groups. The Women's Centre and GLOW were closed in order to protect its members and visitors. Other groups had forums to discuss the events that occurred as well.

Although these events did not demonstrate the culturally engrained gender bias/stereotypes in society, the sentiments of hate outline, once again, the power of words. As Cher says in her song If I Could Turn Back Time, "words are like weapons, they wound sometimes." Words can damage an individual's dignity and their sense of self. This fundamental human identity need is a vital part of one's self-worth. To an extent, I think it is more harmful to unconsciously use biased words on a regular basis than to explicitly make your views public once or twice , like the poster defamer did. I am, in no way, trying to make light of the situation on campus but I urge everyone to think critically of what we say. In every day interactions, I personally avoid the use of profane words. I am not sheltered enough to be bothered by the use of swear words yet I consciously worked "What the poo!" into my everyday vocabulary repertoire. The way I see it, such variety provides a bit of comic relief while I avoid making other people uncomfortable. We can make efforts to change the way we live, and live outside the circle:

- Embrace emotions. Cry if you need to, it is a natural part of life.

- Don't come out if you're straight. A mentor of mine consistently says "Me & my partner" despite being in a heterosexual relationship. It simply creates a more inclusive environment and does not portray heterosexism.

- Challenge yourself and engage what is typically feminine or masculine (depending on your gender) and try to like it! It may be cheesy, it may be ridiculous but do not write it off without giving it a chance.

- Be aware of the words you use and what they mean/imply. How does saying "Hey guys" to a group of all girls come off?

Words have power. Yet, I also want to raise an issue with being over-sensitive. It is not uncommon for me to hear my friends having difficulty choosing the right words to describe someone. For me, it is okay to call someone "black" or "oriental" if you are trying to differentiate them from someone else, as a descriptive adjective. Alternatively, if there is a value judgment associated with the statement, that is when the issue becomes sensitive.

In the Dominican Republic, machismo acts as a cultural code of interaction where both men and women see all this behaviour as normal. It will even be harder to be cautious of my words in a different culture when I go abroad. Reading pre-departure material has advised me to find myself a copy of a Spanish Phrase Book. I only hope my inclusive behaviours resonate with others and can be interpreted correctly and respectfully in my experiences.

Please join me in doing so!